You're hot, then you're cold. You're yes, then you're no

So, I really need to be comfortable coming out and talking about it or Im going to go nuts. Nate and I have been trying to concieve for 8 months now without success. I was starting to get concerned. Not because of the 8 months, I understand most couples it takes around a year. But a lot of people forget about my past and the whole 3 1/2 years before Nate. So, Ive been worried. I went to the Doctor on month 6, trying to see what I should do next. He told me that he thinks my issue is that I am not consistently ovulating at all and that I needed to be put on some fertility medication. So, I was prescribed Clomid 50mg. I felt great on it at first, but during my time of ovulation, I started to feel really funny. My whole lower belly started to get really big and painful and I didnt understand what was going on. The pain became so great that I went to my Doctor who hooked me up with an ultrasound. As it turned out, the Clomid worked a little TOO well and unfortunately I ended up having a mild form of what is called OHSS (Ovarian Hyper Stimulation Syndrome). Basically, I got more than I bargained for an ended up with 6 eggs being released and If these medicines stimulate the ovaries too much, the ovaries can suddenly become very swollen. Fluid can leak into the belly and chest area. And some women end up being hospitalized from it. So, I was instructed to take my temperature daily to make sure infection wasnt happening and take it easy. Finally, I got over that mess, but it also did not work. So, the Doctor prescribed me Femara. Which ironically is a breast cancer drug, but now days it is being used more to make women ovulate. I took it and felt fine, but it makes you have hot flashes(which are WEIRD) and fine, but just more frustrating more than anything. I took the Femara and went in for a follicle check on day 11 of my cycle. No response at all... Least to say, I was not happy. So, he had me take 5 more days of the Femara and then come in again. I went in again today. Either I already ovulated and missed it, or again it did not work. So, now he is talking about possibly having us go to a fertility specialist. He says we can risk just doing Clomid again because we know at least it makes me ovulate. Or I need to go to a specialist for injectables. He also mentioned getting tubes checked and even IUI treatment. Im having a hard time because the only thing I want in my life is to be a mom. The only thing Ive ever done has been caring for children. Daycare, Nanny, teachers aide, after school programs, etc. Its really hard because I love the kids I work with so much. But now I am honestly considering finding a new job. Not seriously. But Ive thought about it. Its really hard dealing with this stress, and then the disappointment. Then, going in the next day to work and love someone elses child that is not your own. I know it sounds silly. But thats whats been up with me lately. Sorry if some of you feel it is TMI. But Nate and I really want to be parents and I just really wanted to talk about it. Getting off soap box now.

Dating Divas

Something has been driving me crazy lately. There is this new site out (or new to me anyway) where women can get wonderful dating advice from these lovely ladies. The website is called "dating divas" www.thedatingdivas.com.
Listen, I understand these ladies mean well, but most of these ideas are not helpful to me in any way shape or form. I think some things on how to improve your looks, health, how to treat your husband, etc. those are great! But these elaborate, colorful, punny, dating ideas...My husband would stand back and smile and nod to be sweet...But inside, he would hate it.
Men like to be romanced. But not in the same way women do! If I were to put together a

Rapunzel themed date


Roaring 20s date


Twilight date night


or something to that effect? My husband would be dying inside...
I was looking over some of the ideas on the site and thought to myself "oh, how cute!". But then I thought I would ask Nate what he thought of them...Nate is the most sensitive, loving, kind, gentle guy on the planet. He's romantic, genuine, and all around awesome. But he's also very honest. He looked at these dating ideas and said to me straight out "honey, please dont do these things for me, I would hate it, and so would most men."
It occured to me that most of these ideas are actually FOR the women, NOT the men.
I think if you are trying to improve your marriage, that is so great!
But you give to each other, not to yourself.
I think that the ideal "date night" for a typical man would be coming home to his favorite meal, his wife in lingere, and watch his favorite movie together. He doesn't care about little colorful pieces of paper. Or the balloons. Or the punny little poems.And he doesn't want to come home to colorful rainbowbrite rapunzel night. Its expensive, its annoying to men. He cares about the effort you put forth. But, some of these ideas are just very girly, and overboard. Im sorry to be critical.
But it made me crazy, and I wanted to express my frustration. I expected a site for ideas that MEN would like. Not that >I< would like...
So, before you go ahead and plan something so pretty, pink, and twilight for your man, ask him what HE thinks. What he HONESTLY thinks about it. See what he says.

I remember the 90s

I stumbled upon someone who did this, and was feeling nostalgic.

I remember my childhood sooo well!I remember the 90's!

I remember when my favorite TV shows were:

Power Rangers


Darkwing Duck


Rugrats


Arthur


Recess


Tiny toons!!


Animaniacs


Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles


Chip and Dale Rescue Rangers!


Ducktales


Captain Planet



Hey Arnold


Fresh Prince of Belair



A simple time when fashion was awesome:

Tattoo choker necklaces


Jellie Shoes


When my mom would do this to my hair...


When a baggy flannel shirt was the only thing I would wear


When Overalls were okay to wear out in public


Slap Bracelets


Sticker earrings


A time when toys were simply awesome and kept us entertained for hours

Pogs


Giga Pets!/Tomagochi/nano pets


When I wanted to save all my pennies to buy Pokemon cards


Skip its!


Slip n' Slides


Super nintendo


Walkmans


Playing "down by the banks"
'

When Red rover was still okay to play at school


Razor scooters


Sky dancers!!!



When all I wanted for Christmas was an easy bake oven


Or an American girl doll


When Polly Pockets were so much cooler!




A time when the only books I would read were

Goosebumps


Animorphs


The babysitters club


When my favorite games were

Mario


Donkey Kong


Street Fighter


Mario Kart


Lets go fishin!


Hungry Hippos



Thin Ice


When Gameboys were amazing


A time when I believed that paper and pencil could tell my future...


A time when my favorite thing to listen to was..

Backstreet boys


The Hansen Brothers


Brittney Spears wasn't insane


And I wanted to grow up to be like Baby spice from the spice girls...


When renting VHS tapes and having popcorn was awesome


A time when Bill Nye was the only thing I paid attention to in school


Or Magic School Bus


And my biggest crush was JTT


When I thought my plastic lunch box was awesome


When Lisa Frank was all over my school supplies


When my favorite candy was

Ring pops


Push Pops


Fruit stripe gum


Bottle pops


Bubble Jug



Squeezits


And I begged my mom to go to Mcdonalds


I remember being afraid that these guys were out to get me..






But also making up pretend games where they actually were :)

I remember waking up in the summers without responsibility.
I remember starting secret "eye spy" clubs and setting up lemonade stands with my best friends Tim, Scotty, Stephen , and Rachelle and Sky.
I also remember getting into fights with them one day, and the next day everything was okay again.
I remember my little brother being my worst enemy. But also my best friend.
I remember when a sleepover meant staying up all night eating candy and playing "truth or dare".
I remember when things were so much more simple.
When I didnt understand the lyrics to spice girls songs.
Before JTT came out of the closet.
When Britney Spears wasn't neccessarily "that innocent", but moreso than now.
When it seemed like being an adult was someone who was 16 years old.
I remember thinking 6th graders were sooo old.
When the worst thing that happened to me was that someone wouldnt let me join in the their game.
I remember not understanding things like death, politics, and religion.
I remember believing without question whatever an adult told me.
I remember my mom trying to get me to do my homework, and thinking it was some form of torture. Instead of understanding that it was actually important...

I remember wanting to grow up...

I miss it. And I regret trying to grow up so fast.
And sometimes I wish I could go back to that simple time when everything was just fun, games, laughing, being silly without worry.
Life is wonderful. I am so blessed. I am so happy. But sometimes, just for a day, I'd like to be a 90's kid again. What was your favorite thing to do as a kid?